I need to say it here...

...because whenever I say things like these at home all I seem to get myself are bitter remarks on: "what-will-you-do-with-your-life? :VV" and I'm kinda sick of it already...

(It ain't as though I ain't trying, but I don't wanna be a fucking journalist and all the betas I try to reach are like...unreachable...or they seem to be that way. Why are you doing this to me, world?! TOT Why can't you make me happy sending me a job I like? u.u Please do so in May ;^;)

Anyways, here's the thing :3  I'm really happy now because:

* My sensei told me I've a pretty voice and that she thinks I can be a seiyuu with no problem XD

* I had a vocabulary workshop and my friends kept showing me off in front of the teachers .___. One was boasting about my English (which, as you know, ain't as good) and the other one was telling them how good I was at kanji in Japanese...and the other one agreed .___. We had lots of fun because we learnt strategies and ways to increase our vocabularies in different languages such as English, Japanese, German and Portuguese :D And it was awesome~ <3

* I didn't have Japanese class today. Instead, we had a kanji workshop in the afternoon XD And it was great because I saw the teacher who helped me in my attempts of studying first level japanese on my own (K san). I thought she wouldn't remember me (not only because it's been like...4 years since I last saw her, but also because I've changed my hair style and stuff), but once, when she had time to, she came near me and whispered: "ひさしぶり" and I was like: "!!! :DDD ひさしぶりですね!" and I was so stupidly happy about her remembering me :')

* Then, when the workshop ended, I stood stupidly near all the senseis (because there were three: one was this one I'm talking about and one of the others was my current sensei) and, as we wen't out the classroom, K san told my sensei that she met me before and my sensei told her I'm a good student and that I tried too hard to keep learning on my own...and K san said the same...and then Y sensei came in too (because she was at the vocabulary workshop yesterday) and agreed with them and I felt so... *insert keyboard smash here* >//////<

* K san and me walked down the stairs together. And she asked me in which level I was...and blahblah...we talked and talked and I told her how happy I was (because I truly, really was) of seeing her again and all...and...she repeated how good she thought I was...and I was so thankful and overwhelmed and happy that I still can't get over it ;^;

So, that's why I'm sharing it here...because I only told people here what happened yesterday...and well... u.u I just wanted to write it somewhere, I guess u.u

Am leaving now because my shita no otouto says my eyes look terrible .___. And I don't really feel that good, physically @_@ XD

I'm so bad at keeping up with blogs XD

I'm so sorry. Really. I know no one reads me but myself, but I'm still sorry. I should be more eager at writing this thing. But there are sometimes I just can't bring myself to do it XD

Anyways: life's been quite nice :3 I'm so obsessed with Sherlock right now and I've already started dubbing classes as in...formally, I guess XD We started practising with a thingie called Rastamouse (about three or four episodes), then an episode of The Fresh Prince of Bel-Air and we've started with Friends' finale, part one XD

I don't like Friends that much, if I must be completely and absolutely honest. But practise is practise, I suppose. And it was great fun because today there were only two girls (a younger girl and me) and, since there are many female characters here, we ended up practising lots ^^

But I almost hyperventilated because I was dubbing a pregnant woman's reactions right when she entered labour...so...they had to record me in a different channel because one of the boys kept getting it wrong...and I was starting to feel dizzy when I had to redo the take. My legs failed me when I did the second scene X_x XD I had to do it as fast and best as I could...so I didn't have to repeat it all over and faint there .___. XD But it was interesting XD

Of course, those aren't going to be broadcasted because they're only meant to be used as scholastic material XDDD

As for my singing classes, I finally managed to reach that freaking G that was giving me problems. And I was so absurdly happy over it that I even drew it XD I must say I can't really say how happy it makes me to be able to release my voice (I still have it a little trapped in there, but it's kinda coming out and I must confess...I very much like what I hear :9). I'm also able to sing Snow White's "Someday My Prince Will Come" decently and also "Love Those Beams", which is, I think, a baroque opera or something like that :3

This is my drawing~ XD Yeah, new haircut :3 Kinda love it <3

I'll start singing about two more small baroque opera pieces next Tuesday...and I might finally get the musical comedy song I'll be singing for the concert next...October, November? I dunno.

It's so much fun and I enjoy this so much. It's so amazing to hear sounds you never ever in your life thought would leave your mouth. I'm so happy, so thankful. And, modesty apart, I really do like what I hear coming from me~ :3

Let's see whether I'll be able to overcome my stage fright and manage to sing at the concert at all .___. LOL

As for Japanese...it's ridiculous how happy I am about that. I'm trying my best and it seems as though I'm being able to bring out results to light XD

The only thing I'm worrying about now is...well...money >3>

I need to find myself a job T^T But everytime I send any CV...no one answers back and I start feeling kinda useless here.

I don't want to end up being a journalist because I really don't like that life. It scares me so much. I won't be able to cope with it and I'll be so miserable .___. I sometimes feel my CV ain't appealing enough and that saddens me. I need to look for things that would help me improve there. But how can I when they ask you for experience no one's willing to give? I've been some sort of freelancer there for about two years at school...but I dunno how much that counts and it makes me feel uneasy. I need to be behind a desk...correcting texts, editing things...looking for interesting projects in order to publish them, convince people to do so, looking for fonts, types of papers, inks...colours... *creys in a corner* I want to be an editor as badly as I want to be a voice actress T^T9

And finish my thesis. I also want that. But my tutor's kinda disappeared...and I'm starting to get kinda anxious here.

*sigh* Those are the only turn downs. But I guess that might be because it isn't the time to do those things just yet ;^;

:)

I'm also waiting for Star Trek: Into Darkness because of this:

(I'm being honest here, don't hate me! >3> *runs away*) And also because of all the explosions, sci-fi, spaceships blowing up in the middle of the sky, derranged chaos and destruction taking over our planet and neverending action package it promises to be :9 (Have you watched the trailers? Hm-mh!) And also because Harrison san seems to have an epic one-on-one battle with Spock san coughcoughoverKirkcoughwut...and it'll certainly be worth seeing XD

Less than a month now for it :9 °((>w<))° May 10th here~ :9 I'm saving money in order to watch it in IMAX...and THREEEEEEEDEEEEEEEEEEEE :VVV Because I need to see if I get a lot more excited about it that way XD

So, yeah. That's life now :3

Also, April's an important month for birthdays as well~ :3 I already said it but: Happy 20th, Kuro huuuuun~! I love you lots~ :3

Next birthdays'll be coming as the month wanes XD :3

Sneaky, your four and your Disney princess are showing...

I know I said I was updating last Friday... But nothing much happened until now XD

First, I must say I do enjoy my Japanese class. It's pretty amazing! °((>w<))° I thought I was going to be way behind all those who had taken first level last semester with that teacher...but I'm pretty much fine XD But I sometimes get the impression some of my classmates think I know way more than I actually do u.u

I'm really happy, tho :DD Even when I get something wrong, I don't feel bad and just feel the will to keep learning to be better at it :3 It's been long since I last felt this way towards something related to school u.u

Second, I'm taking singing classes. And I feel so happy~ <3 But my teacher told me my voice is absolutely light and sweetens as it goes higher...which, immediately, made me think of a Disney princess or something. And it was something like that, actually...because she gave me the score of Someday My Prince Will Come of Snow White and the Seven Dwarves. I feel animals will come to me as soon as I open my mouth and start singing XD

There's this high-pitched note I dunno if I'll be able to hold... .______. I'll also be singing some barroque operas :D I'm slightly scared :D But quite excited too! °((>w<))°

And third...I've declared this year'll be the Guajiro Dreams Year :DDD Where I'll be making them come true :DDD I'm gonna do my best about it :3

Anyway, that's all I had to say =w=

Bonus:

Can you please explain me how are you so damn attractive? >/////< Damn, mister! >''<

Yeah, that means I like him much already >//3//>

And this XDD

I have a mighty need for this thing now XDDD Kid!Loki with his Stark Phone XDDDD

I dunno what to put here, so just...yeah XD

Aaaah! *sigh*

I had my second dubbing class...and my Acting teacher told us what he wanted us to do for our exam on November: we're gonna do "A solid home", by Elena Garro (an AWESOME mexican writer) XDDD I thought I wasn't gonna make it into the play...but, somehow, I did. I'll be a foreign woman and I have to talk in a french accent. I knew I was gonna get the french girl u.u Somehow, people like it when I speak with an accent (by "people" I mean my younger brother and some friends XD).

So, I hope to do a good work. I won't be a main character because I'm a newbie and all, but I find myself really pleased with this u.u 

I'm kinda nervous though =___= I've only got 15 days to memorize it >x< And I'll need a blonde wig .____.

I also read that, somewhere in my city, there'll be a presentation of Shakespeare's Hamlet...but this Hamlet will be played by a girl! °((>w<))° Somebody take me there T^T I NEED to see that ;^; XD

I'm starting to get myself up to date with my french course and I realised I work a lot better when I plan a schedule for work and stuff. So, I might just keep it up that way XDD

...I've also been thinking how much of a Virgo I can actually be .____. Maybe it's the age...

Also, I can't believe I've already got 9 drabbles and that I haven't been missing any of them Ö I'm so proud of myself XDDD 

As for today's drabble... I'll do my best to do it some justice >''<9

Last week, I went to the cinema, alone, for the first time in my whole life u.u It was pretty nice...although I still rather go accompanied to discuss the film afterwards u.u I should write something about that movie, tho. It wasn't that good (at least for my taste), but I kinda enjoyed the soundtrack very much :B XD

Speaking of movies, I also watched "Christopher and his kind" last night and I must say I liked it lots! :D  Not only because of the gay stuff (which, truth be told, was the main reason for me to watch it u.u)...but also because of the story itself and the way it was filmed. I dunno... I liked it very much. And I think...I've developed some kind of weird, intrigue feeling about Matt Smith's facial features ._______.

And I also think he's a funny guy XDDD

I wanted to share something else, but I can't remember clearly .____. Oh! We'll have a mexican party at Dubbing School on Saturday :D Because Sunday's Mexican Independence Day and all that XDDD I'm just happy because of the food...and classes! :D *shoots herself* I confess I'm enjoying them way too much XDDD I'm happy because of that :3 Sad (or thoughtful, more like) because of reasons, but happy because of this =w=

And:

I'm putting this here, since I'm kinda sick of no pics on these entries =w= Monkey Orchid! SO AWESOME!! °((>w<))°

Lalala~

Dadaism... Yeah, right XD

Damn! I'm not good at this orz

*sigh* Anyway. Last post was that short and was a rant because my parents wanted us to go on a family trip to the beach. I'm usually not against it. Problem was I gave my parents a whole week of my time (during which I didn't even go out) and they didn't use it. And suddenly, when I had my whole week planned with my friends and all...they did this. That's why I was all pissed. I had to cancel all my compromises and all u.u

But it was a nice trip :) I might post some pics... Later XD

Hm. I really don't have much to tell. Although...last week was kinda full of things. I saw a friend I hadn't seen in a long, long time. She has changed lots. And she was angry at me because I neglected her way too much. I must confess I am not a constant person (as you can see). It isn't because I don't care. It's just I tend to feel restricted when I have to see/go out/talk to people every day or...when I don't really feel like it...or when I am busy u.u I sometimes feel I'm pretty selfish and that I am not good-friend/good-girlfriend material XD;;; But that's because I think friends are there always... Even if you don't talk to them often... As long as you're there for then when they need you and they're there for you whenever you need them, I think it's great.

Maybe that's what happened. She needed me and I wasn't there for her...

Also, I like to have fun with friends. And...sometimes I felt somehow...stressed when I was with her, because all we talked about were problems u.u I dunno... I did like to spend time with her...but she was so negative sometimes. And I felt, too, that I didn't have much to share with her, since I'm still like...a child-adolescent-stupid girl and she was very keen in growing up u.u Also, I didn't know what to say when she told me about her situation. I had no way of giving my views on the matter. I felt nothing I could tell her or do...could help her in any way. I guess... I simply gave up. I think she's my first big failure.

Anyway. We first talked on the phone. She called because she wanted me to give her back a book she lent me years ago and she also wanted to give me two books I lent her. So, we talked. Obviously, we couldn't skip the main reason why we hadn't seen each other lately. And she told me about her life. I got depressed. She's had a tough one, as always. And I wasn't there. I felt like shit, because I wasn't there for her when she was going through such difficult times. But...what would I've done in case I was there?

I truly have no idea. And I felt useless. I got so self-conscious, depressed and so emotionally drained after that conversation that I fell asleep on the sofa as soon as we hung up. Next day, I saw her. I trusted we would only swap books and leave, but she asked me whether I had something else to do... So, I stayed with her until she did what she had to. We talked. It wasn't awkward. But I still dunno... *sigh*

**

My stomach was upset since Friday because of an indigestion prob D: That and, I think, the stress of trying to register the last two classes I'll take as a degree student, caused it XD Nonetheless, that didn't stop me from staying at my sis's with my other sis (yep, Karl, you're officially my sis now. God bless you, dear, and may Odin be ever with you) and watch yoyo animu with them XDDD It was pretty much fun. You know, because of fangirlism and stuff.

We didn't sleep, btw.

They also suggested something for the stupid story I'm trying to write. Tú (that's my brain's name) likes the idea. I'm still in denial =w=

And today...realisation hit my face, mercilessly. I... I'm about to finish school. No more classes, no more HW, no more...school life. That made me feel self-conscious again. I mean, my sister is having her graduation party in ten days (her mum's paying my ticket... That's so nice of her ;^; I'm in debt). I'm having mine on January, but I don't want any of that shit >''< I don't like many of my classmates. I'd rather have a small meeting with all the people I do like and keep in touch with them u.u Or to have that money to pay for my dubbing classes u.u That's one of my silliest, more desperate, biggest dreams ever.

I'm about to finish my social service in a month. I still need to do that stupid English exam X_x I'm scared! TOT9

Also, I realised I'm still seeing two friends from High School up till now. That's a lot. And I still want to see them. That means they're VERY important to me. And I'm sure Karl is gonna be one of those significant friends too XD

Am also starting an online course of french reading. Should be interesting. I wanna study japanese on my own again :3 So, I might, since I'll have some free time in my hands.

*sigh*

So. That's been it. Feelings all over the place, innit? I'm selfish and I'm self-conscious.

Oh, I've just listened to SID's newest album :D I might post a review here later~ :3 All I can say now is...I FREAKING LOVE IT!! °((>w<))° But, that's the fangirl speaking XD

I hate to be sick :(

My head aches, am coughing like mad... And I think that's because of stress X_x

Tomorrow I'll start researching about my thesis project, so I can give it to my teacher already D:

Today, in a few hours, I might start the critic I'm meant to write. I'm so bad at that X_x I'm bad at pointing out bad things D: But, for me, this was a nice movie D: And one teacher once told me it wasn't cool to make a deconstructive critic, but people used to do them the most because it is easier than to construct u.u

...Unless it is quite horrible... >>

I might even make some kind of comparison between two of the spring releases XDD

Thesis!! D:

It's been tough to think about a proper thesis topic. It's worse now because I MUST have one already in order to pass a class >>

Don't think I haven't been thinking about it, please u.u Because I have. It's just I didn't quite know what to do about it.

But now I think I do. And I'll be meeting my teacher so she can help me at settling it down, finally.

I must confess I'm quite scared. But my topic makes me feel happy and I hope to do a good job so I can get my grade as soon as possible and as nicely as I can :3

I'll do my best! >w<9

And then, I'll try my best too to get a work where I want to :3